Article #34


Indiana Jones and the Secret of my Success!

(Or, the hodgepodge entry)


I’m a fan of Indiana Jones.  No harm in stating that is there?  Over the top action combined with humor, each movie is a non-stop rollercoaster ride (cliché, I know, but it’s the truth).  Granted, you have to leave your brain at the door when it comes to Dr. Jones’ adventures, particularly when he can survive a nuclear blast inside a lead lined refrigerator.  Still, they’re fun to watch.


It’s this enjoyment of Indiana Jones lunacy that made me delve into the comic books, particularly the 1980s Marvel run which was based shortly after the Raiders of the Lost Ark came out.  There’s some really good reading there and some not so great (honestly, riding a freaking DRAGON?).  I believe Dark Horse is currently reprinting Indy’s Marvel run so you too can thrill to his escapades.


What’s interesting is in one particular issue I believe I may have stumbled on the secret of Indiana’s uncanny survival ability.  Here’s a page from The Further Adventures of Indiana Jones #22:




Pretty exciting stuff eh?  By the way, Tarrant was a bad guy too, so Indy didn’t just accidently send a buddy of his to his doom.  Okay, so Indy’s got 24 hours to take care of business!  Let’s see how he’ll get out of this one by turning to the next page…




So let’s get this straight.  The Nazi agent gave Indy 24 hours to conclude his affairs with the Arnhem Ring.  The very next page of the story, they arrive in Switzerland DAYS LATER.  Why didn’t the Nazi just shoot Indy in the back of the head on the train after his 24 hours were up?  Well, there’s the rub.  Now everything starts to make sense in terms of Indy’s survival adventure after adventure after adventure.  Indiana Jones is actually able to control time!!!  Move over Dr. Who, there’s a new Time Lord in town!!!


That, or all his enemies are morons incapable of even tying their own laces.  Take your pick.


Image within the Image Moment Presents:


The Nonconventional Perils of Being a Superhero Part 1


Yes, image within the image is back with a new ongoing subseries detailing some of the problems superheroes can have.  This first case in point points out a hereto unknown risk when having a double identity.  Taken from Shazam #17, it details the side-effect of going undercover using your secret identity.  If your second identity happens to be that of a young lad, and you just happen to be taking a trip on a ship run by a salty old sailor who is probably drunk half the time – chances are you’ll be getting more attention than you ever wanted…




I’m certain that the phrase “I’m boss at sea!” in conjunction with a spanking on the ass is not at all misleading.  No, not misleading at all.  Why do I get the feeling this was the first of MANY spankings young Billy Batson would endure under the squinty eyes of Captain Bryce?  And why is “In the Navy” by the Village People stuck in my head now?